restoration journey (
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femslashficlets2022-02-26 05:53 pm
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Challenge 348 - Art [FE Three Houses, Bernadetta/Edelgard]
Title: the way I see you
Fandom: Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Pairing: Edelgard/Bernadetta
Rating: G
Prompt: 348 - Art
Word Count: 800
Summary: She needs to tell herself it's perfect, otherwise she'll trash it and then she'll never be able to show Edelgard how she feels for her.
It's fine. Nothing is wrong with it, it's perfect the way it is. Don't change a thing. It's perfect.
Most people would call such insistence the rants of the self-righteous artist who won't listen to reason from those who know what's best. Or the bad artist who refuses to accept their own failings and the mandatory pain of self-improvement.
For Bernadetta, it's a mantra she must repeat several times a day to stop herself from breaking the canvas in half and throwing the pieces into the fire. She's been working on this project for over a year in secret, only telling Ignatz about it because while he's good with advice, he also understands how it feels to think you'll never be good enough.
Today, Edelgard is paying her a visit, and the portrait is finally done. And she has to remind herself it's perfect, or all her hard work and Ignatz's kind advice will be for nothing, and she'll have no gift to give Edelgard. Which means she'll never be able to show her how she feels about her.
She doesn't know when her admiration turned into something deeper, but it did. She's aware she risks rejection and humiliation by admitting to such feelings, but every day she tries to become braver and do things without fussing over the worst possible outcome.
So she waits for Edelgard's arrival, the painting covered by a sheet, her heart slamming against her chest as she continues to reassure herself that it's perfect. When she hears horns, she knows the carriage is close and double-checks her appearance in the mirror before hurrying out to the gate.
Edelgard only wears a simple wine-colored dress today, but her hair remains in its regal buns topped with her crown. She looks stunning, and Bernadetta wills her knees not to give out beneath her.
"Hello, Edelgard." She extends her hand. "Thank you for coming to see me today." Edelgard smiles cordially, but her gaze is warm. It always is whenever they see each other.
"It's a pleasure to be here, Bernadetta."
The walk back inside and to the front room seems both too long and too short at the same time, Bernadetta dismissing the guards as calmly as she can and thanking the servant who set up tea and snacks for them at the table. Edelgard's eyes light up at the plate of cakes. Bernadetta hasn't had as much time to cook lately due to her project, so one of the cooks made them.
"Um, before we sit down...I have something I want to give you." This is it, the moment of truth, she can't lose her nerve. She gestures towards the sheet-covered stand, and when Edelgard is watching, she removes the cloth with shaking hands. Little by little, revealing the confession she spent a month perfecting.
The sheet falls to the floor, and Edelgard gasps as she lays eyes on what lies beneath it. Standing, staring, her cheeks slowly turning a bright pink, Bernadetta so nervous it's a miracle she doesn't faint. Please, please, say something...!
"I-I'm sorry, I know it's probably-"
"This is how you see me?" She gestures towards the warm golden aura surrounding the painted version of herself, the tint seeping into the rest of the background. "Bernadetta..."
"Yes! I know you're not actually a goddess or an angel or anything, but you're so strong and inspiring and it was thanks to you I was brave enough to bring down the Church and take control of House Varley!" She rambles nervously, twisting her hands in front of her. "So yes, this is how I see you! You're amazing, even now I still wish I could be just like you!"
"But then you wouldn't be you, Bernadetta." Edelgard takes her hands, squeezing them, looking her in the eye. "I'm glad you've become so much braver, but I'd never want to lose what makes you special." Bernadetta's face flushes, she makes every effort to look her in the eyes.
"You...like that I'm still a scaredy-cat?"
Edelgard shakes her head with a smile.
"You're compassionate. The professor helped me retain my humanity even as I waged war on the Goddess herself, but you're the one who's helped me remember the emotional side of my reform. The feelings of the people I fought to save from the corrupt system, how to make sure those who believe in the Goddess will not be lost and swept aside." A hand reaches up, stroking Bernadetta's cheek. "Thank you, Bernadetta. I'm not the beacon of light you see me as, but I hope someday I can come close to it."
Somehow, Bernadetta doesn't fall to her knees weeping at such compliments. Even now she can scarcely believe when someone praises her, especially the woman she's in love with. Instead, she flings her arms around the other woman's shoulders and kisses her.
Edelgard's lips are warm and sweet as she kisses back.
It's perfect.
Fandom: Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Pairing: Edelgard/Bernadetta
Rating: G
Prompt: 348 - Art
Word Count: 800
Summary: She needs to tell herself it's perfect, otherwise she'll trash it and then she'll never be able to show Edelgard how she feels for her.
It's fine. Nothing is wrong with it, it's perfect the way it is. Don't change a thing. It's perfect.
Most people would call such insistence the rants of the self-righteous artist who won't listen to reason from those who know what's best. Or the bad artist who refuses to accept their own failings and the mandatory pain of self-improvement.
For Bernadetta, it's a mantra she must repeat several times a day to stop herself from breaking the canvas in half and throwing the pieces into the fire. She's been working on this project for over a year in secret, only telling Ignatz about it because while he's good with advice, he also understands how it feels to think you'll never be good enough.
Today, Edelgard is paying her a visit, and the portrait is finally done. And she has to remind herself it's perfect, or all her hard work and Ignatz's kind advice will be for nothing, and she'll have no gift to give Edelgard. Which means she'll never be able to show her how she feels about her.
She doesn't know when her admiration turned into something deeper, but it did. She's aware she risks rejection and humiliation by admitting to such feelings, but every day she tries to become braver and do things without fussing over the worst possible outcome.
So she waits for Edelgard's arrival, the painting covered by a sheet, her heart slamming against her chest as she continues to reassure herself that it's perfect. When she hears horns, she knows the carriage is close and double-checks her appearance in the mirror before hurrying out to the gate.
Edelgard only wears a simple wine-colored dress today, but her hair remains in its regal buns topped with her crown. She looks stunning, and Bernadetta wills her knees not to give out beneath her.
"Hello, Edelgard." She extends her hand. "Thank you for coming to see me today." Edelgard smiles cordially, but her gaze is warm. It always is whenever they see each other.
"It's a pleasure to be here, Bernadetta."
The walk back inside and to the front room seems both too long and too short at the same time, Bernadetta dismissing the guards as calmly as she can and thanking the servant who set up tea and snacks for them at the table. Edelgard's eyes light up at the plate of cakes. Bernadetta hasn't had as much time to cook lately due to her project, so one of the cooks made them.
"Um, before we sit down...I have something I want to give you." This is it, the moment of truth, she can't lose her nerve. She gestures towards the sheet-covered stand, and when Edelgard is watching, she removes the cloth with shaking hands. Little by little, revealing the confession she spent a month perfecting.
The sheet falls to the floor, and Edelgard gasps as she lays eyes on what lies beneath it. Standing, staring, her cheeks slowly turning a bright pink, Bernadetta so nervous it's a miracle she doesn't faint. Please, please, say something...!
"I-I'm sorry, I know it's probably-"
"This is how you see me?" She gestures towards the warm golden aura surrounding the painted version of herself, the tint seeping into the rest of the background. "Bernadetta..."
"Yes! I know you're not actually a goddess or an angel or anything, but you're so strong and inspiring and it was thanks to you I was brave enough to bring down the Church and take control of House Varley!" She rambles nervously, twisting her hands in front of her. "So yes, this is how I see you! You're amazing, even now I still wish I could be just like you!"
"But then you wouldn't be you, Bernadetta." Edelgard takes her hands, squeezing them, looking her in the eye. "I'm glad you've become so much braver, but I'd never want to lose what makes you special." Bernadetta's face flushes, she makes every effort to look her in the eyes.
"You...like that I'm still a scaredy-cat?"
Edelgard shakes her head with a smile.
"You're compassionate. The professor helped me retain my humanity even as I waged war on the Goddess herself, but you're the one who's helped me remember the emotional side of my reform. The feelings of the people I fought to save from the corrupt system, how to make sure those who believe in the Goddess will not be lost and swept aside." A hand reaches up, stroking Bernadetta's cheek. "Thank you, Bernadetta. I'm not the beacon of light you see me as, but I hope someday I can come close to it."
Somehow, Bernadetta doesn't fall to her knees weeping at such compliments. Even now she can scarcely believe when someone praises her, especially the woman she's in love with. Instead, she flings her arms around the other woman's shoulders and kisses her.
Edelgard's lips are warm and sweet as she kisses back.
It's perfect.